Stranded in Barcelona…What a Dilemma.

As I wrote in an earlier Blog, one of the biggest fears of being at sea on a ship is having a fire break out. Luckily in my three years onboard ships, this only happen to me once while we were docking in Barcelona.

The Norway had come out of a 30 dry dock refurbish. We had been chartered by a company in France, so all the guests on board were French and our home port was Marseilles, France.

The alarms went off at 05:30. There are very few people who can sleep through these alarms, but some do. I rose straight up from my bed and reached for the remote control, no, not to watch TV, but to select the channel with the Bow Camera to see where we were.

There were always complaints from the guests and concessions onboard about the Front of the Ship Channel, plus elaborate jokes by the entertainment comedians. For those who do not know, on older ships a channel was assigned to the Bow Camera because it was being viewed by the crew in the Engine Department to check on the marine traffic mostly used for entering, docking and exiting ports.

I could see from the Bow Cam that we were in port so I rolled over and went back to sleep. The first alarm sounding is directed to the crew specializing in fire control. I was not part of that team. Sleep was short lived as 10 minutes later the 7 short and one long alarm sounded which meant general assembly of all on board. That meant everyone had to go to their Emergency Station. I was a Lifeboat Leader and assigned to lifeboat stations number 10.

On went the jeans, sweatshirt & training shoes. I grabbed my lifejacket and made way to my emergency station on International Deck, which luckily was on the same deck as my cabin. When I got to my station I could see through the windows there that we were right alongside the pier. That was very good. There were guests milling about in various type of clothing, pajamas, robes and all kinds of outfits looking lost, confused and still half asleep.

I quickly got my area organized by lining up the guests in straight rows and in an orderly fashion, making sure everyone had their lifejackets done up properly. One thing that you have to keep in mind is that the guests on board were all French. So they had to be controlled and how you did that? Having grown up in Quebec and been to France on previous cruises I learned that you had to speak in a louder tone than they did. Also during this type of emergency the crew is permitted to handle the guests in a firmer manner.

The Officers were patrolling the decks to make sure all was orderly and procedures were being followed through. As the Officer approached my station I leaned into him and said, “How Bad?”

“We won’t be going anywhere for a while” was his response.

“As we are alongside we shouldn’t need to lower the lifeboats?” I asked.

“I don’t believe so, but be ready.”

“It’s getting very warm here on deck.” I said.

“All electrical power has been shut down.”

“That means no A/C.” I said.

We stayed at our stations for over an hour with most of the guests in their sleeping garb and lifejackets on…and it was getting hotter. When another Officer passed by I asked if we could open the International Deck lifeboat access doors to let the air circulate.

The lifeboats on the S/S Norway were locked in position on Viking Deck. When used in an emergency or for crew lifeboat drills, the boats were lowered one deck down to International Deck below. There were double doors on International Deck which were opened so that the guests and crew could access the lifeboats.

He went to his radio and spoke to the Captain on the Bridge to extend my request. The reply came to open only one door at the first and last life boat station and make sure to keep the guests away from the windows edge. My station was the first one so that meant I could open my door. Well, that became a job on its own as everyone wanted to look down the side of the ship.

After another hour we finally got the ‘all clear’ announcement that the guests and crew are released from their Emergency Station and the closing of all the doors on International Deck. This was followed by an announcement from the Cruise Director requesting that all Cruise Staff were to meet in the Cruise Staff office in 15 minutes.

At the meeting we were told that the elevators would not be working, the staterooms & cabins on the starboard side of the ship had A/C but no electricity and the staterooms & cabins on the port side of the ship had electricity but no A/C. The fire had been in one of the switchboard areas in the engine room.

We would not be sailing from Barcelona and we had to get the guests onboard onto buses that would take them back to Marseilles. The challenge was to get the guests from Sun Deck & Sky Deck down the stairs to Biscayne Deck and out onto the pier where the buses would be waiting. The evacuation schedule was set to start at 6:00 PM, with the next groups at 9:00 PM, Midnight and 3:00 AM and 6:00 AM the following day. As soon as the last guests were off the ship we were to be towed and pushed by tugs to another pier where there was no Cruise Ship traffic.

The guests were all advised of the situation and the plan was put into place. Getting the guests down the staircases was an adventure as most of them were elderly and very slow moving. A group of crew members were assigned to walk down the stairs with the guests to aide them. Also every flashlight of any kind and all the batteries available were dug out of the stores so that light could be provided going down the darkened stair cases.

Once they reached the shell door to exit the ship the guests were handed a box lunch and led to waiting buses that would take them back to Marseilles. I was in charge of the team that would direct the guests onto the buses. There were two there Cruise Staff members, Sylvain and Tat who could speak French. We put a plan into place. What we did was to hand off the guests to each other as the busses were filled. The three of us would be at the head of the line and guide the guests onto the buses. I kept the line moving and take care of any unruly guests. Sylvain stayed with the initial group and when the bus was almost full Tat would move to the next bus fill that and then pass off the group off the Sylvain at the next bus. This worked very well and the buses were filled quickly.

We all grabbed a couple of hours sleep between time schedules.

The last group to go out was at 6:00 AM just as the sun rose for a new day and we finished loading the buses at 9:00 AM. The team all went up to the staff mess, had breakfast and went off to bed.

Our next meeting was scheduled for 1:00 PM that day. We had a full crew assembly and the Captain told of us of our situation. The damage was extensive enough that the ship would have to stay in Barcelona for 3 to 4 weeks for repairs. Those who were not involved in the repairs were given the option to go stay onboard or go home. If we decided to go home it would be at our expense. This was good for the crew members from Europe as they could easily go home by air, train or buses, the later being the least expensive.

Most of my fellow department members chose to stay onboard the ship.  Hey! Three weeks paid salary, in Barcelona, with no duties onboard…do the math. We had a great time. We could walk to the town centre, walk up and down Las Ramblas, open air cafes, great food. At night there were disco clubs and best of all, an Irish Pub to lull the hours away. Priceless.

While walking through the shopping plaza I spotted a sign that showed white water rafting. I spoke with the person at the desk and got a price for a group trip. I took this to the Crew Welfare representative onboard the ship and plans were made to take those who wanted to go. The trip included lunch at a nearby hotel which made it a great day trip. We had a marvelous time.

The following week I found an excursion to a theme park which was modeled after the parks in Orlando Fl. This also was a great adventure.

Before we knew it all the repairs were completed and we returned to our cruise itinerary. We had some down time and got to enjoy this area of Spain. Those who stayed on board really enjoyed being stranded in Barcelona.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!

Dozer Through The Ice, An Adventure in the Great White North.

In the 1970’s I worked for a construction equipment & supply company on the James Bay Power Project. Where is James Bay? Look at a map of Canada, look for a large body of water called Hudson Bay (Baie d’Hudson) that borders the North West Territories, Manitoba, Ontario and Quebec. James Bay (Baie James) is at the bottom.

What was the weather like, you ask? The ice came off the lake in July and was frozen again by the end of October in the town of Matagami, Quebec where my warehouse and house trailer were located. Matagami is 400 miles north of Montreal and was the base station and starting point for all works being done on the road construction north to the power dam construction projects on the selected rivers for the James Bay Power Project. Five rivers were selected to create power dams, the Nottaway River, the Rupert River, the Eastmain River, the Broadback River and the biggest of all the Le Grande River. The plan was to build hydro electric power dams on all these rivers which would eventually supply electricity for the whole eastern seaboard of Canada and the US.

I was there for the first 2 years of the project which was the construction of the 700 kilometers (430 mi) James Bay Road to the La Grande River which was begun in 1971 and completed by October 1974 at a cost of about $400 million.

The project was not met with open arms by everyone. There were the environmentalists and the Cree Indian Nation to contend with. It cost the Quebec Government & Hydro Quebec millions of dollars in compensation as the project took its path. Below is part of an article by two men who decided to drive up through this area.

I enjoyed reading this as it brought back many memories of when I worked on the project. The pictures in the towns of Val D’Or and Matagami showed hotels that I stayed at in 1970, before settling down in Matagami, still there today.

The whole story can be found at the following web site; http://www.purplelizard.com/james%20bay.htm

Hydro Quebec calls this "The Project of the Century" and they are most proud of their engineering feats, and rightfully so: in many ways this is an industrial wonder of the world. But at what cost? The "The Project of the Century" displaces the "People of the Millennia", and radically alters an environment and ecosystem that has been relatively unchanged since the last Ice Age. And for what? To drive the energy needs of the modern cultures living in southern Quebec and the northeastern United States. The valleys used by the Cree for over 4000 years have been traded for air conditioning in Boston and NYC. I'm not qualified to weigh the pros and cons of this very large and complex socioeconomic puzzle, but I do feel the need to simplify it to those very basic terms. I doubt the good people of NYC who turn on their air conditioners have the slightest idea they contributed to the destruction of an entire ecosystem to do so. And I fully admit to being part of the problem, as a Maine resident buying electricity from Canada, which remains a problem with no clear solution. In addition to satisfying our core curiosity about experiencing this remote region of Quebec, we were also thinking about some larger consequences of the industries which have become a very real part of this landscape. Hydropower is considered a 'green' energy, a renewable energy, but as with all engineering projects, there are trade-offs. It's increasingly harder to get at the truth.

From Wikipedia; http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Bay_Project

The project covers an area of the size of the State of New York and is one of the largest hydroelectric systems in the world. The project has cost upwards of $20 billion US to build and has an installed generating capacity of 16,000 megawatts, three times more than all of the power stations at Niagara Falls, eight times the power of Hoover Dam, and over twice the power of all eight reactors units at the Bruce Nuclear Generating Station, the largest in North America. If fully expanded to include all of the original planned dams, as well as the additional "James Bay II" projects, the system would generate a total of 27,000 MW, making it the largest hydroelectric system in the world.

While the impact of the James Bay Project was important, above all for the Crees of Chisasibi and Eastmain, there is still some debate within the environmentalist community over its overall environmental impact. While the La Grande complex has disrupted parts of a vast pristine ecosystem, it has also given the opportunity for thousands of gigawatt-hours of electricity to be generated pollution-free: unlike the reservoir of the Three Gorges Dam in China, the northern reservoirs of Quebec neither receive silt from the upstream tributaries, nor produce important quantities of methane, a powerful greenhouse gas.

The price we pay to have A/C on the eastern seaboard.

The paved roads for the starting point of the project ended at a mining town called Matagami, Quebec. This was the jumping point for the project and all the construction companies had offices there. Matagami was a boom town for two years. But once the roads north opened up and the construction companies moved to their respective camp sites, it went back to the sleeping town it once was.

Back to my story…

The road construction crews worked a 6 day week for 11 months and only shut down for one month when the spring thaw can through. During this period it was not possible to move equipment through the area.

I saw many road incidents involving trucks, transporters, earthmovers, mobile homes and cars. Those of you who have seen Ice Road Truckers on the History Channel have an idea of what these Great White North roads offered.

One evening, a dump truck driving from a side road, with the dump bucket still in the air, onto the main highway which leads into Matagami, hit and broke the main power cable. The electrical charge onto the truck caused it to explode, and caused an immediate blackout in town for over 12 hours.

All the homes and businesses lost electrical power. I was without power in my warehouse and mobile home trailer, which were next to each other. As the temperature dropped in my trailer, I set up my sanctuary in one of the small bedrooms.  It consisting of a 5 Star 50 below zero sleeping bag for warmth on the bed and setting up 3 oil fired lanterns for heat. The oil lamps brought the temperature in the room to 60 degrees. When I went to bed the temperature inside the rest of the mobile home was minus 15 degrees below zero Fahrenheit.  Just as I was getting into the sleeping bag, around 11:00 PM, the power came back on. The furnace fired up and distributed the heat throughout the trailer. After a short while I was able to go back to my main bedroom and not use the smaller one. When I looked outside the windows I saw that most of the town was still without power. My trailer and warehouse power was connected to the Industrial Park line and not the town line which was why my power returned quicker.

Within 15 minutes many of my friends and coworkers made their way to my trailer as their homes and trailers still did not have power. By the time we all went to bed I had 17 extra people staying in the mobile home sleeping in the two spare bedrooms, pullout couches in the living area and whatever floor space was open. The wives and girlfriends all went back to their respected homes to get food and drinks for all of us.

Among these people to arrive was a man known as, Rick the Welder, driving his rig & truck. Because of the loss of power and no heat in the mobile home, my water line had frozen. Rick the Welder was able to defrost the line by using his welding rig to send a regulated electrical charge from the city water line into my water system and thaw out pipes. This had to be done carefully as to not burst the water line or send too high a power surge that would melt the solder at the copper pipe joint connections. Frozen pipes happened often in this environment and Rick the Welder knew what he was doing. Under the trailer he created a box where the main city waterline connection and the water pipes going into the mobile home met. In this box he installed a light fixture using a mechanics light & power cord. He explained that the heat from a 150 watt light bulb was enough to keep the pipe from freezing under the trailer. From that day on, my water pipes never froze again. Needless to say, he and his wife got one of the bedrooms.

When living in The Great White North you had to be ready for anything.  One New Year’s Eve I received a phone call at 5:20 AM from a contractor working on the road project. You can imagine what shape I was in when the phone rang. This contractor was not big on conversation and neither was I at that moment. He told me to get out all the longest lengths of reeled wire rope over 1” that I had in stock and that he would be at my warehouse in 15 minutes. I found 6 reels or wire rope that he could use and in exactly 15 minutes, three of the contractor’s trucks were at the warehouse door. As the contractor’s men loaded their trucks I asked the Boss Man what the wire rope was needed for. Remember the Ice Road Truckers I mentioned earlier?

He told me that during the night a truck which was hauling a new bulldozer up to his construction site had gone off the ice bridge and rolled over. Both the truck & ‘dozer had broken through the ice and they needed the wire rope to attach the ‘dozer to the trees on the shore side so that they could locate it at a later date.

The later date was Easter when they started to get the ‘dozer out of the water. I had left the construction supply company and had gone to work for this particular contractor as on site warehouse & purchasing manager. On the evening prior, I was told that they were going to attempt to raise the ‘dozer from the river. It took them 3 days to get it out.

They cut a hole in the ice and sent a diver down to see what the situation was. The diver found the ‘dozer but it was lodged in the silt at the bottom of the river. There were 4 lengths of wire rope still attached to the underwater ‘dozer. The diver secured the cables at the appropriate location on the ‘dozer. He then set up dynamite charges in the silt around the ‘dozer. The theory was, when the dynamite charge is set on off, it would create a vacuum which would dislodge the underwater ‘dozer from the silt and could be pulled out of the river.

The 4 cables that came out of the river were then attached to 4 larger ‘dozers on land and pulled tight. At the exact second that the dynamite charge was set off, the land ‘dozers hit full throttle and started to pull the underwater ‘dozer out. It worked!! The underwater ‘dozer was pulled from the river, placed on a flat bed trailer and on its way to the yard garage.

When I got to the garage that morning, there was the ‘dozer. The crew was in the process of removing all the ice, draining the fluids and changing the hydraulic and fuel filters. At 1:00 PM I could hear the mechanics turning the motor over so I went to take a look. The engine was being turned over to get the remaining fluids trapped inside.  At 4:00 PM I heard a commotion in the garage area and again went to see what was happening. They were about to start the motor.

Everyone was gathered around the ‘dozer he and watched as the Master Mechanic hit the starter switch. The engine cranked over, sputtered a few times and then started. At that exact moment where the motor started, there was a large explosion which shook ever point and person in the garage. Something had rocked out of the exhaust stack going straight through the roof the garage leaving a 6 foot hole in its path.

The one area that the mechanics had not cleared of ice and water was the muffler and 6” diameter by 5ft high exhaust pipe, which sat at the top of the motor. The muffler was still full of water and the exhaust pipe had a combination of water and ice still in it. When the motor fired up, there was a pressure build-up in the muffler and exhaust pipe, which created an ice rocket that, went through the roof. Once we all realized what happened, everyone roared with laughter.

The ‘dozer was moved into the back of the garage and parked. When it had gone through the ice, the contractor claimed the ‘dozer as a complete loss. Once it was taken out of the river it could not be used as a complete unit, so it became spare parts. I later went into the cab of the ‘dozer and looked at the engine run time hour meter. It indicated 21 hours, which meant the motor had 21 hours of run time. When the ‘dozer was loaded onto the flat bed truck at the dealership in Montreal the engine was started. The engine continued to run while on the transport truck as part of its break-in period. At the moment that it went into the river it had run for 21 hours on its trip up to James Bay.

It was never to run as a complete unit ever again.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!

Seniors & Supermarkets

When I got off ships I found a great apartment in Hallandale which was completely furnished. It was a one bedroom unit on the fifth floor and had a great view of the inter-coastal waterway. It was a pleasure to sit on the balcony with a coffee or cocktail and watch the boats go by. These apartments were actually Condos as they were all owned by individuals. I soon learned that they were also mostly occupied by seniors and that there was a Condo Board which I had to meet with to be approved to stay in the building. At the meeting I was asked where my wife was. I answered that she was at sea on a cruise ship at the moment. And then it started.

 “What do you mean she’s on a cruise ship? How come she’s on a cruise and you are not?"

"What kind of marriage do we have here where the wife is on a cruise ship with other men and you are here?"

"Are you seeing other women while you wife is seeing other men on cruise ships? This isn’t that kind of a building where women just walk in at all hours of the night.”

One man turned to another and said in a low voice, but not that low.

“You know that’s not a bad relationship. I wish I had thought of that myself!”

When all was straightened out I was approved to stay in the building, but was warned,

“Be careful because we will be watching you!!”

These board are affectionately called the “Condo Commandos”

We stayed there for 2 years and then moved to another apartment for 2 years also which was located in Davie Florida, which is the inland extension of Ft. Lauderdale. From there we moved into a house more inland but still in Davie.

Down the road from our present house is an English Pub, conveniently called, the Pub. On Monday nights we meet with friends for a Fish & Chips dinner, English Beer and take part in the Pub Quiz competition. It’s a fun night out and has led us into many discussions to the correct answers.

On this particular night one of our friends said that they have family from England coming in on the weekend. I said that was great and can they bring some Scott’s Porridge with them for Sarah and I. He said he can get this at his Publix in Hallandale. I remembered that Publix from when we lived in Hallandale and it was a scary place because of all the seniors who lived in that area.

The next day I ventured out to the Publix in Hallandale to see if I could find my Scott’s Porridge. I must say it was an adventure and I had a rush of Déjà Vu as soon as I got there.

It started in the parking lot as I approached an open space. The car next to the spot I was aiming for was a BMW Mini with all its doors wide open. A senior lady was loading what looked like 30 plastic bags of groceries with about 3 items in each bag. She moved from the back hatch window to the passenger door looking for a place to put her loot. At one point she looked up at me and continued bagging her car at her pace. Apparently she wasn’t threatened by the size of the Expedition. I waited for what I thought was a reasonable time and when she was reaching for more bags I made my move into the parking spot next to her. Just at that point, she made a move to the passenger door and pulled the door in. I parked my truck and could feel the icy glare I was being given. I looked out my side mirror to catch her walking down the side of my truck and giving my rear tire a kick. You’ve gotta love Hallandale seniors…that have attitude.

I made my way to the main entrance and again the wave of Déjà Vu returned. It must have been Senior Discount Day at Publix because there was a whole swarm of them in the doorway and the store was jammed. I made my way through the door and over to the cart section. I pulled out one of the only 3 carts there and as I backed up I felt this whack on my ankle. I turned to find two seniors standing behind me. Both had canes, so I didn’t know which one had struck me. They both gave me the steely eyed stare and I slowly back away from the cart at which time they grabbed it and made off with it, hitting me in the knee with the cart on their way by.

I quickly looked around to see if there was any new incoming traffic. Seeing no one I made off with a cart and headed to the Ethnic Food section with Sarah’s voice in my head asking ‘why on earth English Food has to be in the ‘Ethnic’ section.’

I went down the aisle and low & behold, there was a section with ‘English Food’. I tried to see what was available but was being blocked by a senior man handling about a dozen La Choy Chow Mien Noodle tins. I waited patiently, hoping that this man would move down the aisle. When he completely ignored me I said, ‘Excuse me’, in a nice and friendly manner. He looked back at me, shuffled one step forward and continued to handle the tins. I waited 30 seconds and said, ‘Excuse me’, but in a louder and firmer manner. He looked back at me, shuffled two steps forward and continued to handle the tins, again.

This at least gave me a better view at the selection on the shelf.

First off I must say that I was completely devastated when I could not find Scott’s Porridge. There were two brands to choose from. One was labeled that it was from Ireland, but actually was from Massachusetts. The other is called Hamlyns Grampian Oats, Pinhead Oat Meal, produced in Scotland by Hamlyns of Scotland, Cairnton Road, Boyndie, Banff Scotland. That’s what I bought along with a packet of Coleman’s of Norwich Shepherd’s Pie Mix. Now we all know that a debate always breaks out when we talk about Shepard’s Pie, which calls for lamb mince and Cottage Pie which calls for beef mince. I looked at the instructions on the back of the packet and it only specifies mince with no reference to beef or lamb. Done!

What next caught my eye was a box stating,

Made in Yorkshire For Over 30 Years, Original Mix for Yorkshire Puddings, from Goldenfry Foods Ltd, Wetherby, West Yorks.

I couldn’t do without this as well as a jar of Heinz Piccalilli Pickles, Coleman’s Classic Mint Sauce, cans of Heinz Baked Beans, Ambrosia Devon Custard, one packet of McVities Chocolate Layered Digestive Biscuits and one of McVities Fruit Shortcake biscuits. (Never cookies in the English section.)

That being done I made my way to the 15 or less express checkout line but first, my curiosity that it is, I had to see what the senior man with the La Choy tins was up to as he was still next to me all this while. I pulled in ahead of him a slight way down the aisle and looked back. He now was taking the plastic lids off the tins, blowing off the dust from the tops of the pull back lid, wiping them with his sleeve, snapping back on the plastic tops and resetting the tins back on the shelf. I thought to myself, ‘Now that is quality control. He must be a senior spy from La Choy who was in charge of Dust Control.’ That’s what I call client service.

Into the15 or less express checkout line I went doing a count of my items so that I would not be singled out, when the action continued. The Aisle was very narrow so instead of getting in behind the person in front of me, I placed my cart at a 90 degree angle so that people could get by. In no time at all this caused a disturbance. The people behind me, French Canadians, didn’t leave enough room for others to get by, so the interaction began. A senior lady wished to get by and started to ram the French Canadians with her cart. The French Canadian lady started to mumble in her native tongue as the senior lady yelled back to make room so that she could get by. Finally enough room was made and the senior lady made her way through hitting everyone else’s cart on the way. I heard her say ‘Stupid Frenchies’ as she went by me, ramming my cart of course.

When the two male seniors in front of me, who I guessed were brothers as they looked alike, were ready to pay for their purchases they started a debate as to who was going to pay what.

“I’m not paying for your salami. It gives me gas & heartburn.”

“Well I’m not paying for your lettuce. It does the same to me. And besides that, Mr. Big Time, why can’t we get the Publix soup instead of the fancy-schmancy brand you picked up. What do you think I’m made of money?”

“Made of money? If I had your money, I’d burn mine”.

“Ahh whadda you know? You know whadda you know? Nothing, that’s what!”

Back and forth they went until they finally put out what each owed, splitting the total in pennies & nickels.

Luckily the rest of my checkout procedures were eventless. But as I walked back to my truck I thought,

Where else can you get your grocery shopping done, AND get a show for $38.00?

You’ve gotta love the senior “Condo Commandos” in Hallandale.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!

SHORT STORIES Leaving the S/S Norway, A Sad, Sad Day & Dinner at Le Bistro, sans Bob…

Leaving the S/S Norway, A Sad, Sad Day.

I got off ships in March of 2000 and it was very emotional to see the Norway sail away without me. I was saying goodbye to my shipboard family, but especially, Sarah was sailing away without me on board. We had made a plan that I would go to Smith & Wolensky’s, a steak house which was the last building on the channel as the ships sailed by into the Florida Straits. As big as the Norway is, it would be a challenge for me to see Sarah up in the crowd of people who line the decks when the ship sails out of Miami. We decided that she would stand on deck  where there would be less people and easier for me to spot her.

Here is an interesting fact about ships sailing in a channel. You would think that when a cruise ship sailed through the channel it would raise the level of the water. Makes sense to me. Actually it is the opposite. As a ship sails through, the water actually recedes and pulls away from shore. This is due to the turning of the propulsion system which draws water through it and raises the ship. In doing so the water pulls away from shore.

When the Norway went through the channel it pulled more water away from shore than any other ship. It was quite a sight to see.

But on this day I wasn’t looking at the water line. I walked out onto the concrete blocks in the water so that I could be seen from the ship by Sarah and I could look for her on deck. I had both my still and video cameras in hand.

    S/S Norway sailing out of Miami

    S/S Norway sailing out of Miami

                                 Jerry waving with Sarah next to him

I scoured the decks looking for Sarah but could not see her. The ship goes through quite quickly so I didn’t have much time to see her. I spotted a very big, tall person waving wildly and realized it was Jerry, one of the singers from the Theatre Cast.   And there next to him was Sarah. I started to wave back and suddenly a huge roar came from a group of people on board and they started to wave wildly, calling out to me. It was the entire cast of singers and dancers that Sarah worked with. They had all come out to support Sarah as they knew it was quite an emotional moment for her. It was also an emotional moment for me and suddenly the tears were flowing down my face. Sarah was sailing past on the Norway and I wasn’t there. This was the first time we would be apart for any length of time since we started seeing each other. There was so much going on that I forgot to take pictures or video, as the Norway sailed out. I took a couple of quick pictures and then turned on the video camera just to catch the rear of the ship as it passed by. It was tough seeing the Norway sail away and I watched until it became a spot in the distance.

I slowly walked by to my car, still emotional. I started the car and drove back to the Best Western Hotel, my new home away from home, and started my new life working shore side.

Dinner at Le Bistro, sans Bob…

This is a story Sarah relayed to me. It follows the above story of when I got off the Norway and started my new career shore side.

Sarah and I had a standing reservation for dinner at Le Bistro every embarkation night. On this particular night she kept our reservation but went with Andrew one of the singers from the theatre cast. They sat at our regular table and Zoran was their waiter. Zoran greeted them as professional as ever, but Sarah felt he was a little cold. As the dinner went on Zoran never really was the warmed up or joked with them. And then it hit her. Sarah was sitting at our table with Andrew and I wasn’t there. Zoran was thinking that Sarah was seeing someone else and he wasn’t happy about that. The next time Zoran came to the table Sarah said to him “Zoran, have you met Andrew, he is a very good friend of Bob’s. I spoke with Bob today and he said to say hello to you.”

 Suddenly Zoran eyes lit up and he became his friendly old self. He had thought that Sarah was seeing Andrew now that I was no longer on the ship. When he found out that this was not so, he was happy that Sarah and I were still together. As I have said before, we all take care of each other.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!*

Hemmie Rules or “How I Went Down a Notch in My Own House”

“Well that put you in your place didn’t it?”…

Last May Sarah and I stopped by our friend Malcolm’s house for a beer and a chat, as we often did on weekends. We walked onto his patio and I spotted a cat laying on one of the chairs. There are always cats around Malcolm’s house, but this particular cat we had never seen before. The first thing that I noticed about him was that he had huge front paws, and an extra toe that looked like a thumb. The only other time I had seen this was when we visited Ernest Hemingway’s estate home in Key West. The estate had cats that lived there, and they all had the extra toe on their front paws.

This cat was very mellow, and as I scratched his head he closed his eyes and enjoyed the attention.

I said to Malcolm, “Who is this? I’ve never seen him before”.

“Oh that’s Scruff. He is one of the strays that comes over to eat every once in a while” he answered.

“He seems to have some small bumps on his head. I can feel them when I scratch him.” I said.

“That’s because the other cats usually bash him on the head to scare him away from the food. He’s not a fighter. Do you want him? He’s a stray and needs a good home” Malcolm said.

I looked at Sarah. She had a big smile and even bigger eyes in reaction to Malcolm’s question.

“What’s his history?” I asked.

“He belonged to a family down the way and they abandoned him when they were evicted from their house. Some of the other neighbors and I have been feeding him ever since. You want history? -  listen to this.

Last month, the property management company was doing an inspection of the homes.  Unknown to them, they were followed into the house next door by Scruff, and he was accidentally locked in. The house is empty because the owners are from New York and only come down for the holidays. I noticed that he wasn’t coming around as often, and thought he had found a new home. Last week when I was out in the front yard, I heard meowing and looked around to see where it was coming from. I looked up at the second floor of the house next door, and there he was in the window meowing at me. I got the spare keys for the house and got him out. He was very skinny, but seemed ok. He had been inside the house for about a month. Now, be ready for this - he had opened a cupboard and chewed through tin food cans. Somehow, he had chosen cans of peas, that had liquid in them, which he drank. He is quite the survivor.”

I looked at Sarah and said, “Do you want to take him home?” There was no need for an answer as her smile said everything. Malcolm gave us a cat carrier and a litter box to start us off.

Sarah said, “I want to change his name.”

“What do you suggest?” I asked.

“The paws tell you,” Sarah said. “Hemingway is perfect for him”

 “You’ll love this cat”, Malcolm said. “He is very sweet and you’ll never hear a peep out of him.

Not that I didn’t believe Malcolm, but when he said, ‘you’ll never hear a peep out of him’, that is like when you ask for directions and someone says, ‘It’s right there. You can’t miss it, and then you go on looking for your destination for hours.

“I’m really happy that you are taking him knowing that he will have a great home.”

We loaded Hemingway into the car and made our way home. And then the truth came out. The statement “you’ll never hear a peep out of him”, came to light. About every minute we would hear a meow from Hemingway and it got louder as we drove. I asked Sarah to put her fingers through the carrier door and pet him. When she did Hemingway pulled her fingers into the carrier with his giant front paws and held onto her all the way home.

We stopped along our way to pick up some kitty litter and a small bag of dry cat food. When we got home I put the kitty litter in the tray and we placed the tray in the downstairs powder room. I brought the cat carrier into the front room and opened the door. Hemingway stepped out of the carrier, looked around the room and went straight to the powder room. Into his kitty litter tray he went and relieved himself.

“Well” I said, “He knows where he is supposed to go to do that!”

“That’s because you are a very smart little boy, aren’t you Hemingway?” Sarah said. She walked upstairs talking to Hemingway as he followed her up for his first tour of his new home.

I could hear Sarah as she described the layout of the second floor.

“Here is mine and Bob’s bedroom. You can sleep in here with us if you wish. Here is my bathroom and here is our walk-in closet. We go down this short hall and here is Bob’s bathroom. Now this next room is the spare bedroom where our guests sleep when they come and visit. This last room is the office where we have a computer & printer and where Bob is supposed to do his work. But instead of using this room he prefers the dining room table downstairs next to the patio doors where it is brighter and closer to the coffee machine.”

It was as if she was giving a tour to a writer from Best Homes & Gardens. I went out to the garage to put the cat carrier away. When I came back, both Sarah and Hemingway were on the couch watching TV. Sarah was at her end to the right and Hemingway was sitting in my seat on the left.

“Can you move Hemingway over to the middle so that he will be between us on the couch?” I asked.

“Oh there is no need for that” Sarah replied. “You can sit in your recliner and Hemingway can stay where he is.”

I looked at Sarah, and then looked at the cat. He looked at Sarah and then looked back at me…purring. I swear he had a smile on his face and he was thinking, “Well that put you in your place didn’t it?”

I realized right there and then, I had dropped to the third ranking in our house.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!

Christmas 1999 “If You Know What’s GOOD For You …”

Christmas and the holidays are tough on the crew. They are on the ship and their families are back home. My first two years on ships I was home for Christmas. My third year was when I met Sarah so I arranged to be on for the holidays.

There are a lot of parties organized for the guests and also many for the crew. Each department has a party of some sort and the Cruise Staff arranged an event in Trolland, the kids play room. There was food and drinks available and our Cruise Director Denny who is Swedish made a concoction called GLUOGG. It is a mixture of wine, raisins, cinnamon, whiskey, Heineken beer, port wine, sugar, almonds and is served hot. He also organized a present exchange game called ‘Secret Santa’. The way it worked was, when you entered Trolland you were given a number. This number dictated when you would pick a present from under the Christmas tree. Everyone was to bring a present worth up to $25.00, wrap it up and put it under the tree. Tags for names or gender were not to be put on the boxes. Everything was to be a surprise. Now, if you picked a present, and were not thrilled with it but liked a present someone else had already picked, you could switch with that person. No questions asked.

After we had all eaten and were well lubricated, the gift exchange began. Sarah had number 15 and I had drawn number 39. This meant that I had a good look at what presents were available for an exchange, and then hope that no one would exchange with me.  What I didn’t realize was that I held the last number, 39. I would be the last person picking a present and able to switch with absolutely anyone.

We had a great time watching what everyone got and the antics in switching presents. Some people even hid their presents so as not to lose them. There were some great presents and some goofy ones with people trying to encourage others to switch with them. There were CDs, perfume, soaps & bath wash, gift certificates from music & video stores and even a Victoria’s Secret gift certificate. Kelvin our diver friend got a plastic mask & snorkel set, what a bad selection. He tried valiantly to exchange with everyone but to no avail. Somewhere down the line a bottle of Chivas Regal Scotch was the present selected, so I kept my eye on where that was.

We finally got to # 38 pick and I looked to see what it was. At that point Sarah leaned close to me and whispered in my ear, “If you know what’s GOOD for you, you’ll go for the Victoria’s Secret envelope.”

I looked at her in astonishment and she kept looking straight ahead with a smile on her face.

“OK, who’s got the last number, 39?” said Denny. I held up my ticket.

“Here we go everyone, the last ticket. What will it be?” said Denny.

I went to the tree and picked up the last box. It had a shoe box shape and sure enough it was a pair of pink fluffy ladies slippers with little feathers. There was a roar of laughter from everyone as I showed them.

“Wow, just what I asked Santa for!” I said.

I gestured giving them to Sarah and she pushed them away.

 “OK, that didn’t work” I said, “Who has the Victoria’s Secret envelope, let me see it!!”

Another roar came from the crowd. One of the Hostesses held up the envelope so I handed her the fluffy slippers and took the envelope. I then handed the Victoria’s Secret envelope to Sarah and she said, “That’s much better. Thank you!” as everyone kept on laughing.

A lesson learned.

We all partied hard that night, but we also all showed up for work the next day. That was the way it was. You work hard; You party hard; but you always showed up for duties the next day.

The following Christmas Sarah had changed ships and was on the Norwegian Sky. CD Denny was also there and we had another Secret Santa Christmas Party as the year before. When it came to Sarah’s turn to pick out a present, she went to the tree and took an envelope. When she opened it, it was a Victoria’s Secret gift certificate. To be safe she placed the envelope on her chair and sat on it. Nobody asked to exchange with her, or had forgotten what she had picked. At the end of the gift selection Denny came over and asked what we had received. Sarah pulled out the Victoria’s Secret envelope. Denny looked at her and said, “I don’t believe it! That’s two years in a row! What is it? Can you smell those things when they are in envelopes?” Sarah smiled and nodded.

We all laughed. It was too good to be true, two years in a row. Now this has become a tradition. I somehow have to hide a Victoria’s Secret gift certificate in a different parcel so that Sarah cannot tell what it is when she opens up her Christmas presents. This also applies to her birthday.

As they say on Fiddler On The Roof, “TRADITION!!!”

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!

My Tux fits great. "Miss Sarah did a SMASHING job!"

I soon learned that there were many advantages to dating the Wardrobe Supervisor of the theatre company onboard. First of all, my laundry was done expertly on the private machines which were delegated to Sarah. When you sent your laundry to the ship’s crew service there were always surprises.

1.     Did it come back on time?

2.     Did you get YOUR laundry back?

3.     Did you get someone else’s laundry?

4.     Did someone else get your laundry?

5.     Did your article of clothing still fit?

6.     Did it shrink to Ken & Barbie size?

7.     Was it the same color as when it was sent out?

8.     Did some new stain miraculously appear on your clothing?

9.     And too many more to list.

Now all my clothing was washed, ironed, folded and on hangers, returned to me in my cabin.

The biggest surprise was the next Formal Night when I put on my Tux. I had not bought a very expensive Tux. As a matter of fact I had bought a used Tux from a rental company, so you can well imagine that the tailoring left a lot to be desired.

Formal Night is upon us and I put on my Tux. First thing I notice is that the waist was no longer too big. When I put on my shirt, the buttons were all sewed on the front and there was Velcro as a fastener in place instead. The collar button also had expandable elastic in it so that it was not choking me.

The best was the jacket. When I buttoned the front, the jacket was no longer two sizes too big, contoured my waist line and the sleeves were at the correct length. They no longer hung to the middle knuckles on my hands. AND, Sarah had made me a Real Tuxedo Bow Tie. I no longer needed the clip on type.

WOW THIS WAS VERY COOOOOOOOL!!!!

Off I went to the Captain’s Cocktail Party feeling as fit as a Peacock. I never thought that I looked that much of a mess previously in my Tux, but this was the first time in 3 years that the thing actually fit me properly. And it did not go unnoticed.

Club International, S/S Norway

Club International, S/S Norway

My location for the Captain’s Party was at the doorway leading into Club International, at the front of the line of guests. I would welcome the guests to the party, ask them where they were from and position them with the lady on the right and the gentleman on the left. I would then hand them off to the Cruise Director (CD) introducing them by name and where they were from. From there the CD would walk them into Club International and introduce them to the Captain and they were set up for their picture.

The reason that I would ask them where they were from was if they were Scandinavian, then the CD, if it so applied or the Captain could speak to them in their native language. This also worked well if the CD or Captain knew of their home state, again it was a source of conversation.

Not all the CDs liked this, but it worked well with those who did such as the CD at that time, Denny. The others who didn’t I put it off to their being insecure with themselves and wanting all the glory. Believe it or not, there were some of those. It was all about the attention that they needed.

On this evening as I entered Club International, fifteen minutes prior to the start of the Party, CD Denny and the Captain looked at me as I came in.

Captain said, “Look at you Robert. Did you buy a new Tuxedo and where did you get that Bow Tie? Is it from Harrods?”

“Not a new Tux. But it has been altered by my girlfriend and she also made this real Bow Tie for me.” I said.

“I wish I could find someone to tailor my jacket. Look at how long the sleeves are!” said the Captain in disgust, showing that they were to his finger tips.

“Can’t the tailors on board do something with your sleeves?” I asked.

“It takes a specialty tailor to know how to shorten these sleeves while keeping the stripes at the right height and spacing.” was the Captains response. “Those people down below are not qualified for that.”

“Well, I’m sure if you asked Miss Sarah she could do it for you. Her background is in English Theatre.” I stated.

“English Theatre you say? Can she get me a Bow Tie from Harrods? Who is this Miss Sarah and how come I have not met her?” asked the Captain.

“She is the Wardrobe Supervisor with the Theatre Company. I will introduce her to you on the next occasion when you are available” I answered.

“I will be coming through Dazzles later this evening, at about 10:00 PM, be there so that we can meet.” said the Captain.

Dazzles Disco, S/S Norway

At the end of the evening when all the shows and parties were over Sarah and I went to Dazzles to have a drink and wait for the Captain. Sarah was not thrilled about all this attention as she liked to be unnoticed and in the background. I assured her that meeting the Captain will be fun and all would be OK.

The Captain came into Dazzles 30 minutes later accompanied by his guests from the Captain’s Table. The Captain’s Table consisted of the top VIPs and whatever celebrities may be on the cruise. The Captain always selected those who he wanted to join him and those he did not.

This time he had 2 couples with him as well as a female escort. The waiters hurriedly made up a table for them. The Captain sat down and ordered Champagne for his group. He always drew a lot of attention, so I waited until the crowd around him dwindled.  I caught his glance and he waved for me to come over to his table. I did and asked if I could introduce him to Sarah. He got up from the table and walked over to where Sarah and I were.

He looked at Sarah and said, “So you are Miss Sarah? I understand you can fix the sleeves of my coat?”

Sarah lifted up his sleeve and did her thing. She looked up to the Captain smiling and said, “Yes I can.” Short and sweet.

The Captain looked at her and said, “Good. Be on the Bridge at 0800 tomorrow.” He nodded and returned to his table.

Now, here is the problem. The people in the Theatre Company were not early risers. Most of them never got up until the crack of noon. This was because their shows ran into the late night and there really wasn’t any reason for them to be early risers anyway.

Sarah looked at me and I said, “Don’t worry. You can come up to the Bridge with me in the morning. I go up there every morning because they make the best coffee on the ship.” I don’t think I sold her on the early rise thing.

Seconds after the Captain left us there were two glasses of Champagne in front of us. The waiter said, “Compliments of the Captain.” Sarah and I looked over to the Captain and he raised his glass in a toast, as we did in return. That put a smile on Sarah’s face. It also had many people looking over at us wondering who we were and why was the Captain sending us Champagne?

The next morning Sarah came up to the Bridge with me and as soon as we entered the Captain got out of his chair and said, “Miss Sarah. So good to see you this early in the morning. Ha - Ha - Ha - Ha – Ha - Ha - Ha. Follow me to my quarters.” And off they went.

That evening I saw the Captain doing his rounds of the entertainment areas and there seemed to be a step in his walk. I said Hello to him as he walked by. He stopped and proudly said, “Hello Robert. Look at my jacket and how well it now fits. The sleeves and stripes are now perfect. Miss Sarah did a SMASHING job!”

“Looking good Captain!’ I said.

“I certainly am, am I not? Ha - Ha - Ha - Ha – Ha - Ha - Ha” he said with a big smile on his face as he turned and continued on his way.

I asked Sarah if she could ask one of her friends in London to get a Bow Tie from Harrods for the Captain which she did.

At the next Captain’s Party, when the Captain was on stage and had finished his speech, we presented him with his Bow Tie from Harrods. He was over the moon and said excitedly, “There is only one person who would have done this for me and that is Miss Sarah. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. This is a SMASHING gift. Ha - Ha - Ha - Ha – Ha - Ha – Ha. I love it!!”

Word quickly got around the ship of Sarah’s prowess with needle and thread, especially with the Senior Officers. Soon all were coming her way to have their alterations and mending done. It became a lucrative business for her.

The Hotel Director was one of the first to call upon Sarah’s services. He was a fashion fiend and one of his Versace shirts returned from the laundry with a tear in it. He was fit to be tied. Sarah mended the shirt for him to the point that he could not tell where the tear had been. He was ecstatic.

Denny, the Cruise Director was also a customer. For some reason or other, the crotch of his pants kept blowing apart.

The following cruise and for every cruise thereafter, whenever Sarah and I had dinner at Le Bistro, and when either the Captain or the Hotel Director saw us, they would come over to our table and say Hello. This always drew stares from the other patrons. On their way out they spoke with the Maitre D’, and would cover our dinner.

That’s the way things were done on ships. We took care of our own.

*Names may have been changed to protect the innocent!